Oh hey! Remember me?

I thought I'd give a little update, in seeing as I've been here just over three months! By which I mean, I've been living here unemployed for three months -- what is an educated unemployed young adult to do in a job market that is inundated with educated unemployed young adults? What every other educated unemployed young adult does -- go back to school to become an over-educated unemployed no-longer-young adult, or blog while continuing to look for jobs in vain. I'll go with the latter.

Observations on Job Hunting in NorCal:
There are no jobs. Anyone who thinks they can hire in this economy is crazy. No, really, they are legitimately insane. Therefore interviews are always interesting, but you will never actually want the job. You will remain unemployed and will only interact with truly insane people until YOU become legitimately insane. There are now two options:

1. You accept job with legitimately insane person. Money-making prospects slim. OR:
2. You become so crazy you think you can employ yourself and others. You post job openings that only legitimately insane people would ever agree to do. You wait until a bright young thing goes crazy, hire them for an "internship", and make yourself look legitimate. Legitimately legitimately insane, if you will. Money-making prospects slim. But hey, at least you can say you do something. (My sister met one such fellow with me, because he said I could bring her to the interview and he was so creepy on the phone that I did just that. Her reaction: "I wonder if he knows nobody actually works for him...")


I am actually getting pretty good at this job-hunting thing, however. As long as you know going into an interview that hundreds of people apply for every job opening within an hour of it being posted, and that your interview will likely amount to nothing, it really takes the stress out of the whole process.

PHOTOGRAPHIC EVIDENCE.

In case you are a conspiracy theorist, no, I was not making up some elaborate story this whole time. Bailey put up pictures! Oh, no, wait, that shit was totally photoshopped. See, 'cause there's wind on earth, and in some of those pictures, our hair is perfectly still. We couldn't have been in a desert in Arizona! We were actually on the moon, and had it staged to look like the desert. It was Natasha's doing, that sneaky beetch. She said something about feeding us all "vhiskey braid" and turning us all into "leetle Laikas" if we told anyone that Americans had set foot on the moon with her.

Oh, and I promised we would post about our plans and we didn't. Nina left me this morning out of San Jose. We are BOTH moving to LA now. Me in a couple of weeks (from the Bay area), her in a couple of months (from San Antonio). I applied for two jobs today -- one I don't really have the experience for but would be fun, and one I know I'd be really great at, because Environmental/Outdoor Education is my jam and working with kids is so fulfilling. And before you say it, although this blog is the furthest thing from G-rated, I do, in fact, have a filter when speaking to children, so suck on THAT lollipop, mister!

Except I don't talk like that either, because that's even more creepy and weird.

Woo! We made it!

We'll post more tomorrow. But YEAH! WE'RE HERE!

We have sweet plan as well. The adventures .... continue?

So it's been a few days. The ladies and I spent two nights camping out at the Grand Canyon and it was absolutely magnificient (and I can now confirm that yes, it is just a smidge wider than your mother's ... smile). We saw a sunset, a sunrise (got up at 5 for it -- go us!), and pissed off our neighbor's by having a tent party after quiet hours in which Bailey and Nina kept alternately ejecting, "Drink soma dat!" and, "Taste it and see!" in an attempt to get me to keep drinking the Jim Beam. I know my limits, and they knew they had a new hit single. The stupid neighbors just don't appreciate genius, apparently. Losers.

On the way to the Grand Canyon, Nina got locked in a bathroom for 45 minutes. There was no 'station' to this gas station, just an RV park and a restaurant next door that swore to not have the keys. We called everyone to try to track down some keys, and finally the guy in the restaurant "found" the key. Except it turns out it wasn't even locked, just stuck, but he was convinced Nina was just "holding it closed." If you have never seen me be rude to a stranger (I never have been) this was the time. I scoffed at him and said, "Are you kidding me? She wouldn't hold the fucking door closed for forty-five minutes. " And proceeded to kick at the door with my flimsy sandal. But this man's large booted foot turned out to be just the ticket. Yay sir!

NOW WE'RE IN CALIFORNIA! In Los Angeles, to be exact, with Arielle Neal and Grace Vroom. Arielle's roommate Paige is such a sweetheart, too. I am totally in love with this place. We went to Malibu yesterday to see Alyssa Mason and her friend Allie at Allie's beach house. The day was bittersweet... we had to say goodbye to Bailey. It's been an awesome journey so far and I am going to miss the shit out of her. I slept alone for the first time in three weeks and had no one to steal the covers from. Nina wouldn't come down off the couch and cuddle with me. She knows better.

Roswell, New Mexico

So we're in Roswell, NM. Nina, Bailey, and I had a really nice car ride up. Very relaxing, and the speed limit was 80 all through western Texas. Got a little hotel, and we're watching The Office and hanging out. You know, we're just chooglin' ;)

Yesterday, Bea and I got tattoos in San Antonio. Hers looks really good. Hopefully she'll throw up a picture soon. Here's mine, fresh off the press, and red as hell. I love it!

Texas!

(This is me on the way to Texas. Thank you xkcd.com!)

We are in Texas with NINA! And let me tell you... life is pretty collectively life-like. Yesterday, we hung out with her friends at this "pool" (read: really rad swimming hole that was formed by a dam on a creek). The water was this beautiful blue-green and SO clear. You could see straight to the rocky bottom, and there were little cliffs and ledges to dive/rope-swing off of. It was a perfect day, until this lady who clearly hadn't gotten laid in a while yelled at us for cursing in front of her 13-year old son, having glass bottles, and existing in general. Then she had said son take sexy pictures of her, which was gross, but gave me some hope that maybe she would put it on her match.com profile and get some. But then she swam around on a floatie with her little freshly groomed foo-foo dog on her back and it became clear that this woman was never, ever, ever going to get laid, and therefore, would continue to plague this world with her stale cuntiness. Damn.

Bea and I are off to get some ink! Wish us luck!

What happens in New Orleans stays in New Orleans.